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20 Feb 2016 ielts exam questions and practice

20 Feb 2016 ielts exam questions and practice

 

Essay: 273 words

 

Question:

With an increase in the number of privately owned vehicles, roads are becoming more congested.

What measures could governments and individuals take to deal with this situation?

Sample Answer:

Recently, it has been observed that traffic has become more clogged these days. To address this concern, government as well as individual needs to play their role to tackle it appropriately.

comments:

  • repetition (recently , these days) in first sentence

At the government level, they should need to make the public transport system very effective. Firstly, the cost of the tickets should be very reasonable so that people could afford it. The more convenient the price would be, more beneficial it would become for travelers to capitalize it. Secondly, the service has to be frequent enough, primarily at peak hours to cater the crowd. In this way, commuters will be stress free while opting them as their means of transportation.

comments:

  • should ? need? do not use both same time

Another measure could be imposing congestion and toll charges during rush hours. For instance, no one would want to pay extra when they can use other cheaper means to reach their destination. This will let people who are really in need to use these roads or mostly commercial vehicles. These measures will certainly enforce people to use public transport, thus avoiding congestion on the roads.

comments:

  • “for instance” linking word is not appropriate here
  • Sentences need to make more logical connection to form unity.   i would suggest to explain the second sentence more in detail then start third sentence which shows effects. what you should do is build more explanation for each point then making general statements.

Similarly, individuals need to act on accordingly in alliance with government. Both stakeholders are inter related to overcome this problematic concern. If public transport has been well maintained, ultimately people would prefer it over wasting time in traffic congestion. Consequently, less private vehicles would be on the road. Moreover, they should need to use their cars in off peak hours or in emergency circumstances.

Comments :

  • first sentence and second sentence share same statement through different words. Again i dont see to much explanation. There is grammatical range but that is limited but if you share more details , your cohesion and coherence will improve.

sum up, for avoiding traffic, responsibility cannot be thrown over to government entirely. Improvements in public transport system could be beneficial only when Individuals will start to utilize it to the fullest.

Comments:

You need one writing class, get time to take class please

Essay written by Taha

Online student in al khobar uae

He is taking writing module classes in which he wishes to get 8 band score. He gave previously and secore less than 7 each time.

 

One Response so far.

  1. tauqeer says:

    government must have to sit and observe this situation very seriously because at the peak time the roads are mostly jam and people are fed up from this regular hectic.
    The government should have to give cheaper tickets of travelling by train or buses etc.so in this case automatically people shift them to public transport for saving bucks which would help them in future

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